At The Piano: Trusting My Instincts

Faye at piano, photo by Marv

There is no doubt that the practice of jazz and blues grounds me every day. The rhythms, the pivot of note sequences, their unexpected sounds, delight, challenge, and frustrate me.

Old habits, dormant all the years of absence, awaken as I tackle a new piece. One cannot approach syncopated rhythms or swing with the same mindset as the repetitive rhythms of a simple Bach sonata. Yet, my mind leaps in search of predictability.

What is predictable is the need for focus and effort. To become acquainted with a new piece, I sight read. I try on the piece, test my ability to follow the upper clef melody or lay down the rhythms in the lower clef. The decision to dig in and learn the piece is mine. As an adult learner, I make the choices based on appeal and intuition. Unlike the strict tutelage I endured as a child, I am as responsible for strategy and questions as my teacher.

The work is demanding, requiring inordinate patience with myself. I have been here before— at the crossroads of embracing a challenge, wondering if I have bitten off more than I can chew. The irony of learning jazz and blues is that the simplest, most basic pieces are boring.

Parts of my first book by Martha Meir, found at a local music store, were challenging enough to lead me through the frustration of fingering and counting new rhythms into a sense of possible mastery.

With increased confidence, I purchased Meir’s books 2, 3 and 4. Book 2 called out to me immediately. The piece, Misty Night Blues, infused delight like the first taste of hot fudge over vanilla ice cream. Since beginning lessons, I’ve learned to trust my instincts. Without knowing how, I make choices that work well for me.

During yesterday’s lesson, after playing a piece, Kim, my teacher, asked, “Did you notice any funky rhythms?” I had, acknowledging that I had “faked” or improvised one measure. Rendering the mix of an eighth rest, sixteenth and eighth notes all in 4 beats had frustrated and eluded me during practice sessions.

Kim reached for the music, took out her pencil and drew a straight line between every note and signature in the top and bottom measures. As I followed Kim’s mapping, my hands eased over the keys. I came away with a new keenness to tackle the “funky” parts of two other pieces. Jazz and blues demand precision. I must, in effect, contain my impulse to improvise until I master what the composer intended.

Some days, the Trump era news is so rattling, I fear I will not be able to concentrate. But once at the keyboard, beginning with a piece I know well, allowing my mind and body to merge and become entrained into the sound of coordinated rhythms, I am grateful to engage in possibility.


14 thoughts on “At The Piano: Trusting My Instincts

  1. Rosemary Booth

    Lovely question the writer asks: Has she “faked” or improvised a measure? And interesting that this turns out to be the heart of her learning–if, and when, to veer (musically) off-script.

    1. fayewriter Post author

      As always, you zero into the heart of the question.I am surmising that improvisation has its own set of rules whereas “faking’, at least in this case, reflects the struggle to master the rhythm. Much to learn!

  2. Hy Kempler

    sounds good to me. Admire your taking on this challenge. I await my invitation to your first salon concert.

    1. fayewriter Post author

      Hy, Ha, your comment brings back memories of the yearly auditions I suffered through as a child. Experts, like from the Boston Conservatory sat at a table, pencil in hand, as I (alone on the stage) played my scales, arpeggios, pieces for a “rating.” In retrospect, my teacher was as much on the line as I. I shook like a leaf…. Sorry, no salon in my future.

  3. Carol Steinman

    This work gives me another reason to admire you.You express your endeavors here so well as you manage to turn your dedication to a reoccurring challenge into a source of gratitude. I mean it sincerely when I say you are impressive.

    1. fayewriter Post author

      Carol,You know how much I enjoy the challenge of learning and all the more so with music and its immediacy at this stage. It’s so satisfying when I get it right! I’m so grateful for your awesome support!

  4. Patricia Rogers

    Faye…another lovely piece about your process to tackle the challenge of relearning! As i have tackled my new passion, drawing, i keep reminding myself of “beginners mind”! Learning the basics, the foundations of drawing can actually be very difficult. You reminded me of this in your piece to “contain my impulse to improvise until i master what the composer intended”. Although i will never be a Picasso, i find myself eager to get to my sketch pad each day and wake up at night struggling to figure out how to get the branches of that tree resembling the birch tree i see each day on my walk.

    1. fayewriter Post author

      Pat, I can “see you” on your walk, trying to take in the birch tree shape…. Picasso, it seems to me, improvised a whole lot.. to the point of the unrecognizable. I’m sure, at some point, the image, the hand and eye, will click and you will enjoy the labors of your struggle to adopt the beginner’s mind. Onward!!

Comments are closed.